It’s a Diesel, People.

So I had the worst gas station experience this morning that I’ve ever had. I went to the Exxon station at the intersection of Cornwallis and 54 in Durham this morning. I’ve filled up there before, and I know you can’t pay at the pump for diesel there, but I put up with it, because it is convenient, and on the way to work. I parked the car, got out and right as I was about to put the nozzle in my car, I was hollered at by a man who told me that I was about to put diesel in my car.

Oh noes! That poor, helpless woman doesn’t know the difference between diesel and petrol! I can’t let this poor, clueless human with girlparts destroy her engine with the wrong fuel! I must spring into action by
flailing and yelling!

Fuck you. The D in TDI stands for diesel you dumbass.

So after I embarrassed Mister Man, I went inside to pay, only to discover that they didn’t know how to turn on the pump I was on, then had to go switch pumps and go back inside. They finally got a pump on, and it took over a minute for each gallon of deez to pump, so I cut it off at 5 gallons and got to steppin’.

The dumbass guy aside, I’m done with this has station. The staff is stupid, the pump is from the dawn of time, and the people who work there are unpleasant and ill equipped to do their jobs.

It’s just some fucking diesel, people. It shouldn’t be this hard.

Straight Male Friends: I Am Not Your Territory to Claim

Dear Straight Male Friends and Acquaintances,

This has been bothering me for a while, and I haven’t figured out a way to say this elegantly, so I’m just going to say it:

I am not your territory to claim.

Almost six months ago I started going out to bars, clubs, and music venues regularly again. The last time I went out regularly, I lived in Pennsylvania (State College, Pennsyltucky), and it was a college town just like where I live now. I’m a lot older and the culture is a lot different here. Guys are more forward up North (both a blessing and a curse). Here in North Carolina, people are much more aware of the territory boundaries in social settings. I’ve yet to see guys challenge each other over women in any gathering here in NC. So if I’m out with a straight male friend, it makes it more difficult to strike up conversations with other men.

As my straight male friend or acquaintance, don’t fucking do things that give others the impression that we are together. When you have a few drinks and you get chummy and put your arm around me, or if you play cute and try to get me to dance, or if you hug me from behind when I’m watching the band play or waiting at the bar for my drink, you’re claiming me. You’re putting out a signal to every other guy in the place that had any inclination to talk to me that I am territory that you have claimed. Furthermore, because American culture is fucked up, you can claim me, and then go chat up a bunch of other girls in the joint and no one would have an issue with it. If I do the same thing after you’ve claimed me, guys will not want to talk to me, or they will assume that I’m loose, because I’m up in more than one guy’s business.

I have very little personal space, and I’m a hugger. It is not in my nature to push people away, but I am going to start putting up physical boundaries specifically for my straight male friends and acquaintances, because you’re holding me back and preventing me from meeting new people.

Let me illustrate how you fucking kill my game:

Straight male friend and I are watching some live music and having drinks at a bar. I see a guy that I find interesting, so I make eye contact, and we exchange smiles and nods. Maybe 30 minutes later, interesting guy comes closer (less than 3’ from me) and we exchange greetings, more smiles, and an appreciative nod to the band. Straight male friend sits down on the other side of me, and puts his arm around me, and gives me the stupid flirty smile. For the rest of the night, interesting guy will not get within 10’ of me, will not make eye contact, and finally disappears into the crowd.

This actually happened, and I haven’t been to a bar or club with this friend since. I don’t have plans to either, because he is arrogant, is very cognizant of his man-prettiness, and gives off a territorial vibe. It’s guys like him that always have that awesome female friend that is perpetually single, and can’t figure out why said friend is single.

Just take a minute and think about what you’re about to do before you do it. If you’re out with your single lady friend, don’t drape yourself over her if you’re not interested in her! It’s just that simple. She’s not your possession, so don’t treat her like one.

Thanks,

-Your friendly neighborhood biracial chick with a righteous afro

All of the Update

So I’m slowly catching up with all things domestic. I also managed to sell both the Canon 7D and BlackBerry 9800 I posted about here. That money will put a significant dent in what I owe on the 5D Mark III and the other gear I bought.

My next big move is to clean and rearrange the furniture, and make a REALLY serious attempt to sell my comic book collection this time. I love my comics, but I’m cool with graphic novels, and I’d like to reclaim the rest of my bedroom. 

I have a ton of pics from three shows to go through, and I’m trying to decide whether or not to haul butt to Charlotte to see Carson and The Seasonal Affair next Friday. We shall see. 

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Home Stretch by The Seasonal Affair

This is my favorite North Carolina band right now. They just got started, so everyone needs to show them some love!